Ah, the wonders of the Internet! Here I am, with a busted doorbell at the Parental Units' home, and a bag of raw artichokes in the fridge. Knowledge, precious and useful knowledge, is but a query away.
(yawns and squints at page) Mm. Voltage from the stem to the artichoke heart should read 18 volts AC...
...Or am I supposed to steam the transformer and scrape off the secondary winding, then dip the solenoids in garlic butter?
(types "Obfuscation" into search engine and ends up on a page entitled "Medical Writing")
All right, that's it. No more Ms. Nice Guy.
(seizes Her Clue-By-Four™ and chases Insomnia Gremlins down hallway with Extreme Prejudice)